January 30, 2009

What have I done?

I got this from Matt. The rules are relatively simple: bold the items you’ve done; don’t bold items you haven’t.

1. Started your own blog. ... hello?

2. Slept under the stars. In Lincoln Park in Chicago. I was homeless.

3. Played in a band. Keyboards, tambourine, harmonica.

4. Visited Hawaii.

5. Watched a meteor shower. By accident, same way I saw the Hale-Bopp comet.

6. Given more than you can afford to charity. Whatever I've given, I could afford.

7. Been to Disney World / Land. Disneyland. With my mother, just the two of us.

8. Climbed a mountain. The Smokies, Adirondacs, and Catskills... in a car.

9. Held a praying mantis.

10. Sang a solo. Yeah, at a neighborhood block party. I sang "Back In The U.S.S.R."

11. Bungee jumped.

12. Visited Paris. With my German boyfriend. We ate at a restaurant on the left bank with my ex, a New York expatriate.

13. Watched a lightning storm at sea. There was a storm, but I don't remember lightning. I don't remember anything but hanging on to my dinner plate while the silverware slid off the table.

14. Taught yourself an art from scratch. All artists have.

15. Adopted a child. I was a houseparent in NY but that was temporary.

16. Had food poisoning. I thought I was gonna die.

17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty. I passed by the lady every day on the Staten Island Ferry for years, and never set foot on Liberty Island. I'm a New Yorker.

18. Grown your own vegetables.

19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France. She gave me a dirty look.

20. Slept on an overnight train. Booked a sleeper on the Lakeview Limited many times between NY and Ann Arbor in my college years. Only way to go.

21. Had a pillow fight. If that means fighting for a pillow, yeah.

22. Hitch hiked. Many times in my youth. I was molested once. I enjoyed it.

23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill. Not that you know of.

24. Built a snow fort. No doubt.

25. Held a lamb. I helped shear one once.

26. Gone skinny dipping. Every chance I got.

27. Run a Marathon.

28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice.

29. Seen a total eclipse. Only a partial eclipse. I flashed a glace, thinking a second or two wouldn't hurt. That was a mistake on a couple of levels. The sight, with the naked eye, of that bite out of the sun was cosmically surreal and unsettling. I had a flare in my vision that lasted for more than an hour.

30. Watched a sunrise or sunset. Every other day.

31. Hit a home run. On a baseball diamond? Never did. In seventh grade I did catch a pop fly that ended the inning in my team's favor. Panic-stricken, I stuck out my mitt, blinking, and plop! The ball landed right where it was supposed to. The team ran out en masse to hug me, like you see in the World Series.

32. Been on a cruise. No, but I took a freighter to Europe.

33. Seen Niagara Falls in person.

34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors.

35. Been to Amish community.

36. Taught yourself a new language.

37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied. Yes.

38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person.

39. Gone rock climbing. Hasn't everybody climbed a few rocks? The Ramble in Central Park has one that I'll never forget.

40. Seen Michelangelo’s David

41. Sung karaoke.

42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt.

43. Bought a stranger a meal in a restaurant.

44. Visited Africa.

45. Walked on a beach by moonlight. Yeah, but it wasn't that impressive, a little spooky, really.

46. Been transported in an ambulance.

47. Had your portrait painted.

48. Gone deep sea fishing.

49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person.

50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris. No, but I've been to the bottom.

51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling.

52. Kissed in the rain. Probably.

53. Played in the mud. See above.

54. Gone to a drive-in theater. Many times in my youth. I saw Breakfast At Tiffany's there. My brother ditched me in the car to go make out with his girlfriend; I couldn't have cared less... I was enthralled. I was nine. I was Audrey Hepburn.

55. Been in a movie. You'll have to read my memoirs.

56. Visited the Great Wall of China.

57. Started a business. Yes, but I'm retired.

58. Taken a martial arts class.

59. Visited Russia. The closest I got was East Berlin.

60. Served at a soup kitchen. Thanksgiving dinner with my best friend.

61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies. Bought and eaten quite a few.

62. Gone whale watching.

63. Gotten flowers for no reason. Who needs a reason!

64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma. Yes. I should do that again. I'm O- which makes me a universal donor.

65. Gone sky diving. S-s-s-sky d-d-d-diving? My friend Dennis used to go until it got too expensive. I asked him what happens if your chute doesn't open. He said "you bounce."

66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp.

67. Bounced a check. Rings a bell, but I don't remember where or when.

68. Flown in a helicopter.

69. Saved a favorite childhood toy. Only in my memory. I've lost them all.

70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial. Yes, I've visited the theme park on the Potomac.

71. Eaten Caviar. Yes, but but what you usually get is lumpfish roe. Way too salty.

72. Pieced a quilt.

73. Stood in Times Square. Practically lived there.

74. Toured the Everglades. Driven through it a few times.

75. Been fired from a job. I had a summer job as a busboy once. I asked the owner if she was wearing 'White Shoulders.' This seemed to have annoyed her.

76. Seen the Changing of the Guard in London.

77. Broken a bone.

78. Been on a speeding motorcycle. And lived to tell the tales.

79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person.

80. Published a book.

81. Visited the Vatican.

82. Bought a brand new car. It has its advantages.

83. Walked in Jerusalem.

84. Had your picture in the newspaper. The first was when I addressed a rally at the fourth of July in my home town in middle school. I lost count after that.

85. Read the entire Bible. In pieces, on the Staten Island Ferry. It took a couple weeks.

86. Visited the White House. No, but I've protested in front of it.

87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating. I used to shoot, dress, and grill small game as a boy.

88. Had chickenpox.

89. Saved someone’s life. My cousin told me I did.

90. Sat on a jury. I didn’t make it past voir dire. It was a drug case. When polled, I told the judge that I thought marijuana prohibition was ridiculous.

91. Met someone famous. You'll have to read my memoirs for the details.

92. Joined a book club.

93. Lost a loved one. Who hasn't...

94. Had a baby. That's what we called each other, anyway.

95. Seen the Alamo in person.

96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake.

97. Been involved in a lawsuit.

98. Owned a cell phone.

99. Been stung by a bee. And wasps, deer flies, horse flies, spiders, and fire ants. I'm still here.

Getting there